I'm not dead yet!

Nope I'm still very much alive. I've just been very busy. And life is getting better now so there's not much to write in this emo blog.

Fitness-wise, I'm getting there! Yes, proud to say that I haven't given up yet, despite the myriad of injuries I had gotten myself. I'm getting big (and fatter), but that's I want now. To get big. And strong. And all hulky and all. Then cut the fats and voila, dream body achieved. I make it sound easy I know, but really, losing weight is bloody easy, it gaining weight that is hard for me. Jasmine boosted my ego that day when she was over at my place and commented on how big I looked.

And nope, I'm not together with Jasmine. We're really just BFFs now, and she's the one girl I can share everything with. There's nothing I feel awkward about sharing with her really. That day when she came over though, I gave her a massage. The massage started becoming a little close for comfort as my hands started sliding close to her boobs, and my package was basically up against her very awesome butt.

But then I stopped, and told her that if I carried on I'm probably gonna rape her there and then. Yes I do miss the sex very much, but right now I value our friendship more than my own horny needs. And it's strange how we can still talk about it after that and she telling me I have to just to jerk it off. Haha yes, we are THAT comfortable with each other now.

The reason I'm back writing this now is actually because of some strange, crazy feelings I have inside about a good friend of mine. It's developing into something really strong, and I just thought it would be a good idea to pen it down here before I drive myself mad. But as of now I can't really find a way to put it down in words, so that's for another time. Jasmine and Mark, my mechanic, are the only ones who knows about my feelings for this girl. Mark seems to think we're really good together, but it doesn't override the fact that she's in stable relationship for 7 years. Yes, again. Falling for an attached girl. Sucks to be me I know. Jasmine thinks I'm gonna drive myself crazy thinking about her. I know I am, but damn I can't help it. GAWD.